No matter how many positive things you do, do you ever get the
feeling it is always the one thing you don’t do perfectly that
people notice?
No matter how many positive things you do, do you ever get the feeling it is always the one thing you don’t do perfectly that people notice? Kind of like the proverbial tiny black spot of ink on a giant white page. What’s the first thing anyone will point out when you hold up a huge white page with a small black dot in one corner? The black dot, of course! I receive a lot of mail, both positive and negative, including mail critiquing what I write in my weekly column in The Dispatch. In the same day, I might receive both mail praising what I’ve written and mail suggesting that I go join the terrorists of Al-Qaeda. But I figure a negative reaction is better than no reaction. Apathy would scare me, but anger means there are living and literate human beings out there who care enough to write. As long as that is the case, it is a positive thing. In addressing the concerns of my most recent critic, Helen Wineberger (letter to the editor April 9), I have to say that if she can remember which of my columns annoyed her so long past their date of publication (such as one she cites from last October 31), then at least my writing is memorable.
In spite of what Helen Wineberger suggests, I have a happy life here in this wonderful community, and I only occasionally feel like doing any “juvenile whining.” There are definitely times when I write out of dissatisfaction, but my goal is to contribute to our community. Judging from the feedback I receive, people from all walks of life find the column interesting. I am invited on police ride-alongs and to speak at Unitarian churches. The Gilroy Presbyterian Church has asked me to speak next month. The good mail I receive far outweighs the bad. The Dispatch is a wonderful forum for reflecting all the good going on in our community, pointing out opportunities for us to participate more, and all the hard work of the many people here who are making “good news,” not just “bad news.”
Corresponding with even my harshest critics has become a richly rewarding experience, as I learn to focus on addressing the issues (not the personal slurs) that a critic raises, rather than simply becoming defensive. All of my critics have responded to e-mail I sent them in reply, and one said, “Thanks for the reply (most people cuss me out).”
Recently, one of my critics even applauded me for the different viewpoint expressed in my column. I’m just glad to have a dialogue going with people of all different points of view. I am interested in writing local human interest stories of all kinds, and I am here to serve our community. I believe every Gilroyan has a unique story worth listening to, just like Rudy Grube’s story in last week’s column. I’d like to hear Helen Wineberger’s. I invite her to tell her story in my column.
It’s interesting the way one thing you try leads to another. You just never know when trying something new where it will lead or where life will take you. The important thing is to be willing to try new things, even things that scare you. One standard of excellence is how well we afflict the comfortable and comfort the afflicted – including ourselves. Writing this column took me outside my comfort zone, and it generates both criticism and praise, neither of which should be believed 100 percent. The truth always lies somewhere in between.
