I laugh heartily and cry with big sobs. I’ve done a lot of both
in the last few days. Cancer tends to do that to people. An
initiation into the cancer club comes as a terrifying shock to
everyone who joins. Although my melanoma was eradicated four years
ago, the emotions have stayed with me.
I laugh heartily and cry with big sobs. I’ve done a lot of both in the last few days. Cancer tends to do that to people. An initiation into the cancer club comes as a terrifying shock to everyone who joins. Although my melanoma was eradicated four years ago, the emotions have stayed with me.
The laughter this last weekend came from boating and swimming with my neighborhood buddies at Lake Nacimiento. It’s hard not to swallow gallons of lake water while floating on your back with a life jacket and busting a gut watching middle-aged people trying to climb a cliff over the lake to dive off, testing their life insurance policies.
The big sobs came during the funeral of a childhood friend. Susan Schilling Robinson – or Susie, as I knew her as a child – left us last week after a year in the cancer club. Her funeral was on Sept. 11. More than 1,000 mourners packed the Morgan Hill Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to say goodbye to the smiling lady we all loved.
Susie had big emotions, too. Usually they were happy emotions where her smile would cause her eyes to squint – the most genuine smile I knew. Susie left words for her mourners that were read by her brother Steve, including her realization that cancer had changed her view of life and her emotions were bigger and better.
Those not in the cancer club may overlook this bit of advice as they painstakingly work to “maintain their composure” and refrain from beating their breasts and screaming their outrage at loss and their fear of death. But Susie knew that life is a proving ground for authentic emotion. Some get it, some don’t.
If you’re lucky, like I am, you get a second chance to live more, love more and feel more. That’s why I like the parties. They are the gatherings where friends and relatives get the chance to celebrate life. Go ahead, enter the room like an emotional bam-bam. It’s guaranteed you’ll be invited back to liven up the next party.
Ladies from the class of 1984 – including the former Lisa Silva (senior class president at Live Oak High School), Gigi Gunz, Lisa Crow, Tina Pederson, Lisa Upton, Christi Peterson, Marianne Collins and Dina Tozier – all came to say farewell to the smiling high school athlete. It is our collective 40th year on the planet, and Susie had just missed her big birthday by a couple of weeks. We mourned the loss of the celebration, but we know Susie will be waiting for us at the gate of the ultimate party.
Ciao for now.
