I had this column all figured out. I was going to write a smirky
beginning about how swine flu would be much less scary if it was
called
”
pig flu
”
or
”
hog flu.
”
Even though editors write headlines, I was going to suggest the
title
”
Swine Flu: Shouldja freak out?
”
and proceed to firmly dispel all panic surrounding this
disease.
I had this column all figured out. I was going to write a smirky beginning about how swine flu would be much less scary if it was called “pig flu” or “hog flu.” Even though editors write headlines, I was going to suggest the title “Swine Flu: Shouldja freak out?” and proceed to firmly dispel all panic surrounding this disease.
And then … I freaked out.
Pretty badly, actually. I was out of the country for a few weeks recently, and my pediatrician had told me to call to schedule my daughter’s vaccination when I came home. Upon my return, when she said, “Call again at the end of the week” and after that week, “Call again in a month,” I began to feel very, very uneasy.
I hadn’t thought the porcine flu would dare put a cloven hoof in our door, because I mistakenly relied on my entire family getting vaccinated. As a health care worker, my husband had to be vaccinated, and as a pregnant woman I automatically got it, and I had felt assured that the pediatric dose would be forthcoming. Yet only the first two panned out. It felt very selfish and odd to have us vaccinated, but not her.
I consider our toddler high risk for two reasons. First, my husband works in an emergency room where he has daily contact with presumed swine flu victims. Secondly, our child has a history of very high temperatures. I still remember the day the thermometer read 107.1 and I was ready to roam the streets as a feral madwoman howling and drooling on myself. (We discovered our thermometer runs one degree too hot, but that’s still a really scary temperature.)
It doesn’t help that I’ve been researching infant mortality in the 1800s for a novel I’m writing. A biography about Mary Todd Lincoln stated that in her era, most families had lost at least one child to various diseases we now control. How different must the American culture have been when everyone had experienced that most profound and unfair of losses?
And then-I got the news that someone our family is very close to, who has daily contact with our daughter, was sick with flu-like symptoms. That’s when I lost it.
I try really hard not to cry in front of our child, but I just couldn’t stop myself that day. She kept saying, “Don’t worry, Mommy” and intuitively offering me a gray crayon.
I began a barrage of phone calls, trying to locate someone who had the vaccine for children.
The good news was, the South Valley Clinic offered a vaccination clinic that following day. Hallelujah. I expected a madhouse of parents as flipped out as myself, but it was an incredibly easy and professional experience. We waited only one hour in line and got the dose.
Huge congratulations to South Valley for pulling off such a well-organized clinic – our country hasn’t experienced this kind of epidemic in years, so figuring out such an efficient protocol was quite a feat. In line, we received a pre-printed card with a number on it – ours was 453, and that did correspond to the vaccination number. This efficient team gave away hundreds of vaccinations by the end of their clinic.
The next day, I returned home from a baby shower to find our daughter feverish. The rapid onset and high temperature is indicative of that … uh, shall we say, Sow Flu, and the irony was not lost on me that I had been elated to finally vaccinate her, only to find it was too late. That was a few days ago. We’re not certain she really had the swine flu … her fever is now completely gone and throughout the whole thing she was her old self-no evidence of the tell-tale aches and pains.
So here’s the good news, the panic-dispelling I wanted to be the entire column and is now relegated to the bottom.
The swine flu is just not that bad. Pretty much every flu right now is swine flu, and it requires the same treatment as regular flu, so they are not bothering to swab to confirm except in certain cases. People get it, and the vast majority of them recover.
My husband tells me that the fatalities are in large part due to pre-existing conditions that compromise people’s immune systems, like bad lungs, kidney failure, uncontrolled diabetes, etc. So if you and yours are normally healthy, even if you get the swine flu you should be able to weather it like any other flu. You may be uncomfortable for up to a week, pounding Motrin and Gatorade, but please don’t convince yourself that your family is going to have the same tragic tale the Lincolns and their country people did – and consult your doctor if common sense tells you to.
