So the new year is here again. To some people, it’s the perfect
time to lose weight or start a new hobby.
So the new year is here again. To some people, it’s the perfect time to lose weight or start a new hobby. To others, it’s simply a good time to reorganize the filing system. Me, I look at it more as a chance to step back and assess my life and pinpoint exactly where I went wrong.
Here is my list of what I would’ve done differently if I had 2002 to live over again:
I’d leave all of the chocolate candy in the kids’ Halloween bag.
I would help my fourth-grader with her social studies project instead of trying to pass off a Legoland car wash as Mission San Diego.
I would stay until the end of the PTA meeting instead of sneaking out early to go shoe shopping.
I wouldn’t yell at my daughter not to yell at her brother.
I would keep all of my 7-year-old son’s baby shoes.
I wouldn’t insist that the cat be in the Christmas picture.
I’d take the kids camping during their vacation instead of on a seven-hour car ride to a theme park.
I wouldn’t gloat so much over beating a 7-year-old at Candyland.
I’d get my hair all the way wet in the swimming pool.
I’d let my kids eat frozen corn dogs frozen. At least once.
I’d put the ornaments the kids made on the good side of the Christmas tree.
I’d put up more finger paintings on the refrigerator door and less schedules.
I wouldn’t cut my kids’ bangs.
I wouldn”t have tried so hard to get to the bottom of who spit in the chocolate milk first.
I wouldn’t have fallen so easily for the old line: “Homework? What makes you think I have homework?”
We’d watch more live theater than reality television.
I wouldn’t show the kids any pictures of me prior to 1992.
I’d have more meaningful conversations with my children, other than why, on opposite day, the statement, “Go wash your hands and come eat your dinner,” does not really mean, “Go jump in the mud and spit at your sister.”
I wouldn’t get on the scale the day after Thanksgiving.
I’d look in the toy box before reaching into it.
I’d talk to my children in the car instead of listening to the radio.
I wouldn’t buy low-rise flair leg jeans.
I wouldn’t wear low-rise flair leg jeans.
I’d enjoy our Christmas lights more instead of worrying about the electricity bill.
I’d buy my son a microscope for his birthday instead of a train set that comes in six-eight thousand pieces and has directions in Portuguese.
I’d say “I’m sorry” more and “I told you so” less.
I’d fake my age in the family photo album.
I would find the time to take my family to the pumpkin patch instead of picking our pumpkin from the bin in the produce section at the grocery store.
And finally: I’d learn how to program the VCR.
Debbie Farmer’s column appears every Monday.
