There are lessons I want to teach my son.
I want to teach him to be fair and honest. I want to teach him
empathy.
There are lessons I want to teach my son.
I want to teach him to be fair and honest. I want to teach him empathy. I want him to understand love. I want him to be a good person. I want him to be happy. I want him to be a good sport.
I’m not a perfect mother, but I do try to teach my son all those things – and I’m sure other parents do, too. I’m even sure that the parent who adopted – and later returned – Bella is trying to teach her daughter those things.
Because she finally realized that Bella belonged to someone else. Not like a possession – a toy or a couch, Bella belonged in the sense that she is part of the original family. And nothing – not even adoption by someone else – could change that.
So I am happy that the adoptive mom gave Bella back.
Look, I sympathize with both families. It’s hard to separate a child from an animal – even if she only had it a few days. And I’d rather pull all my teeth out without Novocain before I’d want to take a birthday present away. But I can’t help but feel that the right thing was done when Bella was returned. I guess that’s because I’ve had a lost dog.
We had just moved to Gilroy and my dog, Carnie, dug underneath the fence, got into a neighbor’s yard, escaped under their gate and wandered the unfamiliar neighborhood. Like Bella, she didn’t have a tag on. I had taken it off the previous day because it kept catching on the new carpet.
So the Gilroy police picked up Carnie. She was held for a while at the station. The police or the humane society or someone was going to take her to the Santa Clara shelter. Fortunately, I found her before that happened.
I can’t even imagine how devastated my family would have been if Carnie had been lost to us forever. If someone else had seen her cheerful little face, her happy, wagging stub of a tail and decided that she was the dog for them. I know in my heart I would have paid any price just to get Carnie back. Because, although I could get a new dog, I couldn’t have replaced Carnie in our lives.
For me, dogs are part of the family. I can tell you the names and personalities of each dog I’ve known. I can tell you about Princess, the poodle mix who ate my mother’s leather couch. Or Heidi, the German shepherd that failed obedience school. Charlie and Diana, the shi-tzu’s from hell – nothing was safe from their chewing. Abby and Maggie, the other shi-tzu’s from hell. And Taco, the first dog Harry and I made part of our family. He was the ugliest dog we’d ever seen and smarter than any dog on the planet.
And, of course, there’s Carnie. She’s part of our family. And I’m sure Bella was part of her original owner’s family. And I’m even sure that Bella would have been a part of the other family, too.
But deep down, I’m glad that the new family gave her back. And even though this was a tough lesson for a 10-year old, I hope she learns from it. I hope that she learned that doing the right thing is sometimes the hardest thing of all. And that it takes empathy, good sportsmanship and love to help us understand that.
But most of all, I hope that the little girl’s mother learned that animals are a part of our family – not possessions.
