Facebook and Mom

Recently my mom realized it was the 21st Century and did something that literally a billion people have done before her: she joined Facebook. Now, if you believe this isn’t a tragedy in the making, you clearly do not have a mother on Facebook.
First of all, my mother is what you might call “technologically impaired.” Sadly, a hallmark of this devastating disease is that my mother has no idea she has it.
She, in fact, believes she is the most technologically advanced grandmother on the planet. I don’t know why she thinks this, because it’s obviously not true.
I mean, my 94-year old grandmother knows how to use the remote control for her TV, so obviously she is the most technologically advanced grandmother on the planet. Or at least she’s the most technologically advanced great-great grandmother on the planet.
But back to mom and her delusions. Look, my mother has trouble downloading books to her iPad. This is something the Kindle app does automatically when you buy a book. But my mother can’t accomplish this, which is obviously the fault of Amazon since we have established my mother is the most technologically advanced grandmother on the planet.
Anyway, Mom is on Facebook. To start her Facebook experience, she uploaded eleventy-billion pictures of herself, her children, her grandchildren and her great-grandchildren. And that is why my mother’s Facebook has one single picture on it—mom hugging a goat
Nowhere to be found are the photos of her entire family tree. I don’t think it needs to be said, but clearly none of us are related to the goat. OK, maybe my brother-in-law.
The real problem is, we don’t know where she uploaded those photos. For all we know, some other woman who intended to only have a single picture of herself hugging a goat is now the proud possessor of a Facebook page with eleventy-billion pictures of multiple generations of strangers.
Then there is the friend issue. My mother has no idea how to accept a friend request. She calls me all the time asking why I don’t comment on her statuses. This is because she has never accepted my friend request. I can only hope that someday she will.
Or not. Actually, maybe it’s better this way. I think I’ll stick to hoping she can finally figure out how to find her books on the Kindle app.