An English historian named Thomas Fuller once observed,
“friendships multiply joys, and divide griefs.”
This was evident Saturday afternoon during the Celebration of
Life for Lynn Shimek at Fortino Winery, where 150 friends, family
and community members found bittersweet solace in shared memories –
and comfort amid terrible, surreal tragedy.
An English historian named Thomas Fuller once observed, “friendships multiply joys, and divide griefs.”
This was evident Saturday afternoon during the Celebration of Life for Lynn Shimek at Fortino Winery, where 150 friends, family and community members found bittersweet solace in shared memories – and comfort amid terrible, surreal tragedy.
“It doesn’t matter how much time you spend with somebody. It’s how blessed you are that God has allowed them to touch your life,” said Kathleen Lindsay Noble, a friend of Lynn’s who addressed the crowd of somber attendees who packed tables and lined the winery’s grassy patio on a chilly afternoon.
“Our whole community has lost a unit: A husband and wife, a father and mother,” continued Noble.
Noble is one of hundreds in Gilroy and San Jose – including friends, parents and relatives in Santa Cruz, Oregon and Pennsylvania – coming to grips with a shocking murder-suicide Nov. 28 that left two teenage boys without parents, and a grieving community reeling in utter disbelief.
The bodies of Lynn Shimek, 43, and her husband Chris Shimek, 51 – a San Jose police sergeant of 16 years – were found by Gilroy police officers around 9:39 p.m. last Sunday inside the couples’ two-story home on the 9400 block of Rodeo Drive in Gilroy.
While the cause of Lynn’s death has not been released, the GPD states Chris died “from an apparent self-inflicted gunshot wound.”
Private funeral services were held for the couple Sunday in Campbell.
Law enforcement will not confirm circulating reports from various media outlets alleging Lynn may have been strangled, or that there were signs of a struggle in the couple’s master bedroom. When asked last week if he could confirm any of these claims, GPD Capt. Jim Gillio reiterated the GPD “absolutely has not” released any official information related to the cause of Lynn’s death, or descriptions of the crime scene as the case is under active investigation. The Santa Clara County Coroner’s said Monday it could take around 12 weeks before a cause of death is released, although this is subject to the GPD’s pending investigation.
Talk of disturbing details surrounding what friends call a “senseless” act were absent from Saturday’s gathering, however.
The focus honed on Lynn: A “woman of grace” and “spunk” who loved God and rocking out on the dance floor; a “selfless” individual who connected with everybody she met; a gifted face painter whose bubbly personality is fondly reminisced in the wake of her passing.
While specifics of the Nov. 28 incident were kept at bay from discussion, the reality of domestic violence was not ignored. Many guests wore purple ribbons pinned to their jackets or blouses in a conscious statement against the issue.
As he delivered an opening speech, GPD Chaplain Greg Quirke, a pastor from South Valley Community Church, asked attendees to “make the loss matter.”
“How do we want this to change our lives going forward?” he queried.
Reading aloud, “see to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble,” Quirke cited Hebrews 12:15, underscoring the importance of overcoming bitterness.
Prior to closing, he sang an acoustic rendition of “Amazing Grace” while playing the guitar.
Gesturing to clusters of people who flocked around a table to sign their names in a guest book, longtime friend Ronda Harkins noted Lynn “touched all our lives.”
Harkins’ cousin, Gus Tuomi of San Jose, analogized the attribute as “a jar of glitter.”
“That’s the best way I can describe it,” he said, linking arms with Harkins. “She touched so many of our lives in such a sparkly way. The world will be less without her.”
Two poster boards checkered with photographs displayed Lynn’s much talked-about, “infectious” smile of “pearly whites.” A decorated collection box allowed attendees to write notes to the Shimek children; a separate collection box was designated for donations to a trust fund recently established in the children’s name.
The oldest Shimek son, 19-year-old Forest, described his mother as “a wonderful person who made me the positive person that I am today.”
Speaking into the microphone and glancing toward the sky, he added, “I love you, Mom.”
Forest said his 13-year-old brother wanted to come, “but I told him not to.”
The brothers are staying with Chris’s sister in San Jose. Forest is Lynn’s biological child, whom Chris raised as his own. Chris met Lynn sometime in 1992 when was she was pregnant from a previous relationship.
In addition to face and body painting, Lynn enjoyed brewing her own beer and going dancing with her friends at local hangouts, including the Longhouse Restaurant Bar and Grill and Station 55. She also belonged to the South County Derby Girls, Gilroy’s rough-and-tumble rollers; some of whom choked back tears Saturday while remembering their lost teammate.
“As hurt as we are, we can’t imagine what you are going through,” said one of their members as a group of four addressed the audience. “We have a big team that loved Lynn. And because of Lynn, we love you, too.”
While the celebration of life was dedicated to Lynn, Chris Shimek was not overlooked by a couple of guests who mentioned his name on stage. A speaker named Maria noted, “I have so much compassion for Chris. I will miss them both.”
A native Californian, Chris grew up in San Jose and attended Prospect High School. He served in the traffic division and was hired by the San Jose Police Department in 1995.
Recalling a fun memory of “four adults standing over the sink, scarfing cookies,” a friend named Ellen said “I loved Chris, and I loved that he loved my cookies.”
Like others who depicted Lynn as a wonderful parent who doted on her children, Ellen added, “she was such a good mom. I aspired to be that kind of mom.”
A large, flat-screen TV set up on Fortino’s patio reflected happier times for the Shimeks: The couple sitting side-by-side and holding hands; a beaming Chris flanked by his sons at a younger age; Lynn grinning at the camera, surrounded by her closest girlfriends.
Ellen said Lynn was the kind of person who could make friends with anybody; a woman who “just gave to whomever was around her.”
As she continues to process the maelstrom of pain, confusion and searing emotions stemming from the loss of “my rock,” Julie Nagel, 36, a close friend and confidante of Lynn’s, praised her departed pal as woman who could accomplish anything – and inspire others around her to follow suit.
Noble impressed on the importance of forgiveness.
“We have to forgive,” she said. “We have to forgive, no matter what.”
