Recently, I dared to go where few men and women have gone
before.
Recently, I dared to go where few men and women have gone before.
Their college reunion. And not just any reunion, mind you. But one of the biggies: the 10-year reunion.
I must have been out of my mind.
In the beginning, it sounded like a fun thing to do. Spend an evening with friends with whom I spent my most formative, enriching, challenging – not to mention embarrassing and humiliating – years. What was I thinking?
The problem grew as my husband, Chris, and I began thinking about the logistics. Since our alma mater is in San Francisco, we decided the most practical thing to do was to make an entire weekend out of the adventure. But that meant leaving our 1-year-old daughter, Emma, outside of our presence for an entire 24 hours – something we had never done.
It wasn’t like we were sending her off with a beeper and a pat on the head; she would be left in the excellent care of my parents. But I was still worried that she wouldn’t be able to cope without us. Or maybe I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to cope. Or maybe a little of both.
Then I started thinking about the nitty gritty details: what in the world was I going to wear?
That question haunted me for weeks. Our college reunion wasn’t a black tie or especially dressy affair. Thank goodness for small blessings. But I would be required to look passable, presentable even in front of my former classmates.
This, in my mind, posed a small challenge. You see, I haven’t appeared quite myself for the past 24 months or so, or ever since I became a mommy-in-waiting. Oh sure, the scale eventually stopped spewing out a ridiculously high number and settled back down to its original pre-pregnancy number. But parts didn’t quite settle where they used to be. Some fell. Others took on completely different shapes – and none of them attractive.
I knew I would be able to tell within moments of seeing my fellow women graduates one important detail: whether or not they’d had a baby. I just hoped I wasn’t a give-away.
But as the day of the reunion neared, I found myself thinking less about what I was going to – or not going to – wear and started thinking about my college years.
The homesick, unsteady first few months spent at college were gradually brushed away by all-night studying sessions, good friends and some of my most memorable moments.
It was at the University of San Francisco where I found my footing and stepped into my own. I joined a sorority, had my heart broken more than once and attended more parties than I care to remember.
I edited my college newspaper, learned to live on a miniscule budget and even more limited cooking skills, and juggled classes with internships.
And it was at the University of San Francisco where I fell in love with Chris.
It is a special place mired in missteps I would rather forget and yet rich with experiences that have made me who I am today.
How could I consider for even one moment not attending my college reunion? It was simply out of the question. Besides, I was dying to find out what my fellow graduates were doing with their lives.
I found out the following weekend – a glorious San Franciso day where the sun was shining and a slight breeze coated the air. The reunion turned out to be a blast. Sure, USF lost their homecoming game. And I only recognized a handful of people. But I had the chance to spend a weekend with a few close friends who once walked the same hallways as I did, sat in the same classrooms, studied in the same libraries, experienced the same moments, and dreamed the same big dreams.
Some of us have gotten married, some of us have had children. And I found that I couldn’t tell who those lucky few were until they pulled out their treasured pictures of their babies.
It’s amazing and it’s not that 10 years have drifted by. It seems like a lifetime ago that I was the girl I was then, and yet at other times I look around and feel as if it all happened in mere moments.
I’m glad I dared to go back and glimpse my past, albeit a selective glimpse. Ten years into the future makes me appreciate my college years even more.
