Little did I know when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer
in October that it would soon become the least of our worries. As I
waited at the hospital for my mom to come out of surgery for a
partial mastectomy, I looked up and was surprised to see the doctor
hurrying towards me much too soon.
Little did I know when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in October that it would soon become the least of our worries. As I waited at the hospital for my mom to come out of surgery for a partial mastectomy, I looked up and was surprised to see the doctor hurrying towards me much too soon.
“As soon as we started the anesthesia, her blood pressure dropped,” he said with a worried look. “It continued to fall. When it got to 80 over 40 (110 over 70 is as low as you want it to be) and her pulse fell to 29 (when it should have been at least 70), I made the decision to wake her up right away and cancel the surgery. I didn’t want to lose her.”
Tests revealed that my mom has in fact had at least one silent heart attack that we never knew she had. The damage to her heart is so extensive that only about 20 percent of it is still functioning. It turns out my mom has what they call “congestive heart failure.” Yet she has never experienced a chest pain or any other symptom of heart trouble, such as swelling of the feet or ankles, trouble breathing, dizziness, or faintness.
It’s all very hard to believe since until we found out she has breast cancer, she was still working full-time at a job where she regularly lifted 50-pound children in and out of wheelchairs.
Now life has become a nightmare round of doctors’ appointments, hospital visits, and consultations with specialists as my mom has undergone a month of intensive medical care. For example, she endured 14 major medical tests and two surgeries in one four-day period of time.
We really couldn’t deal with the thought of Thanksgiving right now, but an invitation for our family to join friends for dinner with turkey and all the trimmings (and no work on our part required) saved the day for us. In fact, it is the kindness of people in this community like Alene and Russell Sosa that is keeping us going right now.
Lisa Ready, a lay spiritual leader in Gilroy, even committed the crime of trespassing in order to bring us dinner one night. She secretly borrowed our house key from a friend, snuck in with her junior high-aged daughter and put dinner on our table for us, including chocolate mini-muffins for dessert. Her daughter had fun participating in such a clandestine mission (and what a great example her mom gave her of thinking of ways to help others).
Countless people in our community have surrounded us with an outpouring of love, concern, hot chocolate, and visits to sit with us at the hospital. “The prayers, the hope, and the healing love are all there,” one person wrote. “Close your eyes every now and then (but not while driving to be with mom!) and feel that encompassing support.”
A reader named Nancy wrote, “My mother had the same diagnosis and lived 15 years longer. If yours has been diagnosed, at least that is a plus. Now they know what to try to accomplish. When you have a dear one put in the hospital you must use some of that time to take care of the care giver – yourself! You have to build up your resources for your next go-round and more likely, you have to catch your breath so you can meet the next challenge. I am familiar with that low-blow-to-the-stomach feeling.”
Because of all of you, I can say thank you at a time when it is harder than it has ever been for me to feel thankful. You show me that I can still be grateful even when stress and worry cast shadows over everything, and my legs feel like they are filled with cement when I get up in the morning. After doctors analyzed how poorly my mother’s heart is functioning, they said they couldn’t really explain how she can still be doing so well. It is the goodness of such a caring community that helps keep her (and us!) going – so, please keep those prayers and good thoughts coming!
Kat Teraji is communications coordinator for a non-profit organization benefiting women and children. Her column appears every Thursday in the Take 2 section of the Dispatch. Reach her at ka****@ve*****.net.
