‘There is nothing to do in Gilroy.’ Hmmm.
… In Gilroy, we have beautiful parks, including a skate park,
creeks, mountains, trails, three community theaters, community
symphony, movies, a pool hall, Outlets, workshops on topics such as
how to finance a college education, concerts, art contests, Scouts,
FFA …
“Students strive for a place to call their own,” said the headline on page A3 of Tuesday’s Dispatch.
Gilroy High teacher Valerie Hunt took 21 Gilroy High School students to Los Gatos to tour the teen center there. The teens were naturally entranced with the popcorn, the 96-inch projection screen, and the pool tables of the $1 million facility, which costs $100,000 a year to operate. I was unimpressed with the arguments in favor of such a facility.
The arguments boil down to:
n Teens want this.
n Teens need this.
n There is nothing to do in Gilroy.
n The reason Gilroy teens engage in sex, drugs, and gangs is because there is nothing to do.
Let’s examine these arguments one by one. “Teens want this.” True! Teens always want more than they have. Why should they be any different from any other human being? Librarians want a new library; postal patrons want a new post office; art and theater patrons want an art center; homeowners want their sidewalks repaired. Humans covet.
“Teens need this.” Let us not confuse want with need. Teens need air, water, food, shelter, clothing, education, medical care, love, and supervision. They need to be developing responsibility, compassion, and a work ethic. They want Ipods, cool clothes, cell phones, cars, and freedom.
“There is nothing to do in Gilroy.” Hmmm. I spent two of my adolescent years in San Juan, Puerto Rico. My friends and I had miles of beaches, snorkeling, surfing, rain forests, castles, and a very cool city to explore. We complained that there was nothing to do. In particular, we complained that there were so few rock concerts. In Gilroy, we have beautiful parks, including a skate park, creeks, mountains, trails, three community theaters, community symphony, movies, a pool hall, Outlets, workshops on topics such as how to finance a college education, concerts, art contests, Scouts, FFA, comedy, rodeos, charity work, and sports. Every church in town has a youth group dedicated to providing fun, food, and friendship to teens. We also have jobs and school. When I reached this point in writing this column, I took a break to drive my 17-year-old daughter to Gavilan, where she will attend physics class, tutor, attend physics lab, study, attend multi-variable calculus, then come home. Tomorrow she will work and practice the sport she has participated in for the last eight to 10 years, then come home, check her email, clean some small portion of her room, study a little, and fall into an exhausted but happy slumber. Since I had an actual teenager right there in the truck with me, I conducted a small survey. I asked her, “Why don’t you get involved with gangs, drugs, and sex?” I expected her to say, “As if I had time for that!” Instead, she replied unhesitatingly, “Because it’s WRONG!”
So to any parent, grandparent, or teacher who wonders how to keep kids from engaging in gangs, sex, and drugs when there is “nothing to do” in Gilroy, here’s how: raise them to know right from wrong. Don’t give them the moon, but give them opportunities to work to earn their own moon tickets. If all else fails, supervise the snot out of them.
I can hear the cries now: “You can’t supervise them every minute!” As long as they are on the right track, a parent does not need to supervise every moment. Parents should engage in a little judicious snooping to determine whether their kids are on track. If they go off track, you supervise.
There is a story, perhaps apocryphal, about a mother who was told by a juvenile court judge to supervise her errant daughter better. The mother said, “I can’t supervise her every minute!” The judge ordered the mother handcuffed to the daughter for two weeks. The mother found that she could. Of course, not every child in Gilroy is brought up in a family that brings him up with love, limits, and supervision. Some kids are brought up in families where their siblings and parents are gang members. Whether a teen center would help those children to stay away from gangs, drugs, and sex will have to be considered in another column.
Cynthia Anne Walker is a homeschooling mother of three and former engineer. She is a published, independent author. Her column appears each Friday.
