I learned to drive in a bright green pickup truck loaded with
steel bumpers, dented tool boxes, post-hole diggers, heavy-duty
chains and assorted, greasy wooden blocks.
I learned to drive in a bright green pickup truck loaded with steel bumpers, dented tool boxes, post-hole diggers, heavy-duty chains and assorted, greasy wooden blocks. Given that mental picture, it might not surprise you when I say that when I hit the tree down in the pasture, no one ever noticed (except for the tree and my sister who was sitting in the passenger’s seat – and neither of them did any talking).
I think I was about 13 then, and my dad never let me drive on the road. I was, however, expected to know how to back up a 20-foot-long stock trailer into a narrow parking place between the barn and the antique tractor, without hitting either one. I could make about 10 attempts before my dad opened my door, told me to get out, and did it himself.
During my high school years, I had a veritable stable of eligible vehicles waiting to take me to school: the old white truck, the old brown truck, or the old black truck, depending on what was running and what was being fixed by my father, a talented mechanic who preferred to work on huge Caterpillar tractors. If available, the black truck always won out, because it had a 4-inch “lift kit” and wide tires that made it look very cool. It was so masculine that I should have had one of those corny license plate covers: “This is not my daddy’s truck.”
But everyone knew it was. The trucks all had their good sides, and their irritatingly vile habits, too. The brown truck’s engine often died when it was put into reverse, making a graceful exit from the school parking lot impossible. The white truck’s seat springs peeked through the blue vinyl in inopportune spots – not so comfortable. And the cool black truck, well, its emergency brake earned its name. The brake was liable to pop off if the truck was parked at an angle. And since we lived on a hill along Pacheco Pass Highway, there were a few emergencies.
That’s the thing about farm trucks – they’re always exciting. You never know when you’re going to need a jumpstart, a tow or AAA. Three things are certain: Other farmers and truck drivers will always wave at you, whether they know you or not. Someone will always stop to help when there’s smoke pouring out of the engine. And the more dusty and beat-up a truck gets, the less likely it is to be stolen.
My sister (the one in the passenger seat when I hit the tree) sent me the following list, which cracked us both up. She could relate because the two of us just traded old trucks from age 16 through college, when dad suddenly bought us a brand-new little red truck. The funny thing is, we had grown used to the old trucks by then. But he was tired of fixing them.
Top 10 reasons farm trucks are never stolen:
10. They only have a range of 20 miles before they break down or run out of gas.
9. Only the owner knows how to operate the door.
8. It is difficult to drive fast with all of the fence tools, grease rags, ropes, chains, syringes, buckets, boots and loose papers flying around in the cab.
7. It takes too long to start and the smoke coming up through the rusted-out floorboards clouds your vision.
6. The border collie on the toolbox looks mean.
5. They’re too easy to spot. The description given to the sheriff’s department might go something like this: “The driver’s side door is red, the passenger side door is green, the right front fender is yellow.”
4. The bales of hay in the back make it hard to see if you’re being chased. You could use the mirrors if they weren’t cracked and covered with duct tape.
3. Top speed is 45 mph.
2. Who wants a truck that needs a year’s worth of maintenance, $3,000 in body work, tail lights and a new windshield?
And the number 1 reason farm trucks are never stolen: It is very, very difficult to commit a crime when everyone is waving at you.
• Elsie’s favorite: Marv Fremont sent this recipe to me. His mother, Elsie, used to make it for her three sons. It was a favorite then and now Marv’s own boys ask for this chicken often.
Chicken-in-Chips
8 pieces chicken, uniform size
1 bag barbeque potato chips
1/2 cup milk
1 tsp. flour
Dash of paprika
Make a small hole in the bag of chips. With a rolling pin or your hands, crush chips well. Slit bag lenghthwise in center and fold open. Mix flour and milk together in a medium bowl.
Wash chicken and pat dry. Dip in milk-flour mixture, then press into crushed potato chips. Turn to coat both sides. Repeat with each piece, placing chicken in an ungreased, flat baking dish or cookie sheet. Dust lightly with paprika.
Bake at 375 degrees for 45 minutes or until golden brown.
• Quick pasta: Joanne Fine called to ask if I had a recipe for very quick tomato-based pasta. This recipe is recommended for “pappardelle,” wide pasta ribbons, but you can substitute egg noodles if you like. It’s very quick because the sauce is not supposed to be cooked, only heated through.
Pappardelle alla Siciliana
1 lb. fresh spinach pappardelle noodles (or egg noodles)
2 lb. large, ripe tomatoes, peeled and diced
1 (14.5-oz.) can Roma tomatoes, strained and diced
6 garlic cloves, peeled and pressed
3 T. minced fresh basil (12 to 14 leaves)
2 T. good olive oil
1/2 tsp. salt or to taste
Dash of pepper
Freshly ground Parmesan
Cook noodles in boiling water until al dente. Meanwhile, mix together fresh and canned tomatoes, garlic, basil and olive oil. Mash slightly with a large pestle or potato masher, do not puree. The texture should be rough.
Heat until warmed through. Avoid cooking or the sauce will lose its freshness and will become watery. Salt and pepper to taste. Toss warm tomato mixture with hot, cooked noodles; sprinkle with grated cheese. Serve immediately. Serves 4.
• Simple pesto chicken: Not much time to make dinner? If you’ve got some pesto and chicken in the refrigerator, you’re ready to go. This takes about 30 minutes. Serve with a salad.
Broiled Chicken with Pesto
1/2 to 1 cup basil pesto
1 whole chicken, cut up, trimmed of excess fat
Salt and pepper to taste
Lemon wedges
Preheat broiler, with rack 6 inches below.
Spread a tablespoon of pesto on a non-stick broiling or baking pan; place chicken pieces on top and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Spread a little more pesto on top of chicken.
Broil chicken, turning and basting frequently with the pesto, until nicely browned and cooked through (about 20-30 minutes). Brush once more with pesto and serve hot with lemon wedges.
Tip of the Week:
Make a quick avocado dressing by combining half an avocado with 1 cup vinaigrette dressing in a blender and
processing until smooth.
Notes from Jenny’s Kitchen:
• Wilted parsley can be revived by cutting off 1/2 inch of the stems, standing in a cup of water, and refrigerating for at least an hour.
• One pineapple, peeled and cored, will yield about 3 cups of fruit. The Hawaii Gold variety has won three taste awards in the past year and is slowly gaining a foothold in the total pineapple market. I like this variety because it is sweet, without being overpowering.
• A co-worker used to eat this quick lunch several times per week. It can be made quickly in a small microwave in the lunchroom: The night before, steam broccoli in the microwave. Take to work with a raw potato and a small tub of cottage cheese. At work, prick the potato with a fork a few times, then microwave for 5 minutes. Heat the broccoli. Top the baked potato with cottage cheese and broccoli. Sprinkle with lemon pepper or garlic salt if desired. (This is much healthier than the fast-food version with the plastic American cheese.)
End note: “We have two lives – the one we learn with and the life we live after that.” ~Bernard Malamud
